Why do I think I'd make a good shipwrecker?

No moment would ever be dull if I was permitted to grace the islands with my presence. I promise to entertain with my immature humour and my ridiculous ways. Talking nonesense is my favourite past time, I can do it for hours and never get bored so no time would be quiet with me around. I consider myself quite a craftsman aswell so my DIY skills would come in handy. I also look good with a tan!

What makes me laugh?

NOT jokes are the funniest thing ever! I am also keen on pulling pranks, especially if its an immature one. Simple pranks are the best for example hiding and making people jump or where one person crouches behind another whilst the third person pushes the stood up one causing them to fall over backwards onto the ground. A dick slap around a sleeping face gets a 10 out of 10 on the chuckleometer!

Are you gay if you kiss back?

On a lads holiday in Gran Canaria we were told the gay bars were a good laugh so we ventured down to the Jumbo centre (Gay bars galore). I'd had a lot of ale and the drag act was creasing me so it was inevitable that I was going to need the loo. I walked over to the toilet door only for there to be a young man holding the door knob. I jokingly asked "how would you like to get your hands on another knob tonight?" he smiled and opened the door. I used the urinal and washed my hands, turned around and was confronted by the same lad from the door, he grabbed my shirt and pinned me against the wall before I realised what was happening his tounge was lodged down my throat.....I didnt push him off

Have you got a body double?

Everybody dreams of having the body of a celebrity. Well apparently I have the same body as funny man Will Farell! I find this flattering to say the least.

Have you been caught having sex in nightclub toilets

Yes! I was in the liquid nightclub in Rotherham chatting to a classy lady, the next thing I knew she was bent over the toilet enjoying a meat injection. Suddenly the cubicle door opened, stood there were 3 stone faced bouncers and a crowd of cheering men. My response was to pull up my trousers and exit the toilet hastily leaving the lady to blush alone. When a mate asked where I had been, I retrieved the protection I was still wearing and proceeded to throw it in his face. He was not impressed to say the least!

Hometown

Rotherham! wooop wooop!

Occupation

Accounts Assistant (Zzzzzzzzz)

Relationship status

Long Term Relationship :D

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